Who Was That Masked Lady?

There has been a reemergence of masked ladies at the library. I use the term "ladies" very loosely as so far I have not had one act like a lady yet. They act like a word that rhymes with witches. They are usually suffering from some form of germ based phobia. So what do they do? They come to a public library where there are trillions of germs and patrons who haven't seen a bar of soap in a very long time. Let's not mention little children and adults who don't wash their hands after using the potty then handle the books. It happens. I'm rarely sick and I believe it's because I've built up an immunity from working here. I have so much sick time on the books it's criminal. Let me tell you there is no amount of Lysol or disinfectant that will make this library a safe place for a masked lady because of the sheer volume of people that come here on a day to day basis and the number of surfaces they touch. I would think for a germaphobe that a library must be like hell on earth. So why come here? Some sort of therapy or is it desperation? Perhaps a sign of insanity? Who knows. We now have two masked ladies who use our computers. So far both are typical for their breed. They are insufferable witches for which the staff can do nothing correctly or quickly enough. There is only one way to treat a masked lady and that is with uber politeness, never show fear, never, ever let them see you sweat, never let them get to you.

Back in the day at another Library in Southern California I was introduced to my very first masked lady. She was so convinced that the she needed to protect her self from the poisonous toxins in the library that She would come to the library dressed in full surgical scrubs complete with face mask. Sometimes she would come dragging a mini oxygen tank with her. She was one of the most unpleasant people I have ever had the misfortune to be in the vicinity of. I shudder even now as I think of her.